The office vs the spider
The other evening I was in the office (attempting to work, but probably in reality perusing various blogs and wondering whether it is acceptable to use Green Chartreuse in a cocktail) when I heard screaming from down the stairs. Imagining that something absolutely terrible must have happened, I ran out of my office to see what was going on. By the time I got there, somebody else had started screaming as well and both women now cowered in the corridor clutching one another.
It transpired that they had seen a spider.
‘I can’t go back in there’ one of them says pointing into an office.
‘No way. I just cannot believe that I was in the same room as it’ says the other.
I hadn’t seen the evil creature of doom yet, and having been brought up in a country of Red Backs and Huntsman spiders which really can cause damage, I automatically fear the (admittedly highly improbable) worst. And you know what I’m going to say – yes, it was a teeny tiny innocent looking spider that couldn’t hurt a fly. Well, ok, maybe a fly but definitely not a human.
‘I’m going to call security’ one of them says.
‘Don’t you think that’s a bit over-the-top?’ I say cautiously.
‘Well, how else are we going to get rid of it? I am absolutely not going back in that office.’
‘I’ll pick it up and put it out the window’ I suggest.
Bad response. The spider needs to be killed if we are ever to work safely in the office again. I reluctantly agree to do this.
I take a tissue and squash the poor thing, while the others look on admiringly as though I am some kind of spider murdering hero.
I still feel guilty about it.
Tags: spiders
February 13th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
You should have told them the office probably has dozens of them dotted about the place. Ok, I understand why people don’t like them, wouldn’t want one crawling about on me, but to lose control of yourself like that is something I’ll never quite understand.
February 13th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
If I had dared tell them that there were probably lots more around the office, I would have been there all night killing the buggers!
February 14th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
I hate spiders, you’d have had to do the same if I’d been there – well I wouldn’t have minded it going out of the window actually.
Don’t minds wasps though. I’ve got absolutely no fear of the Wasp
February 14th, 2008 at 9:19 pm
I always wondered why you Antipodeans seemed fearless in the face of the Evil British Spider, until I went to Australia and saw what you have to contend with out there. I felt ashamed of myself. But I still hate the damn things.
February 14th, 2008 at 9:39 pm
Right Planet Mondo, it’s a deal – I sort out the spiders, you deal with the wasps. Nasty things they are.
Evil British spider ISBW? Aw, they’re not that bad. Well, they’re not that great either… Better than the evil British wasp though that’s for sure!